Three Myths and Two Surprising Truths about Humility and Leadership

Humility often gets a bad rap because it's commonly associated with weakness. But in reality, humble leaders are some of the most confident, decisive, and ambitious individuals. In today’s leadership environment, it's critical to dispel the myths surrounding humility and embrace the surprising truths it reveals about true leadership.

Myth #1: Leaders Cannot Be Both Humble and Confident

This is one of the most pervasive myths, and it's entirely false. Not only can leaders be both humble and confident, but I would argue that confidence is essential for leading with humility. Sharing credit, admitting weaknesses, and acknowledging where improvement is needed all require a high degree of confidence.

At first glance, the connection between confidence and humility might seem counterintuitive, but consider this: vulnerability is required to share your own weaknesses. And to do this, you need to be secure enough in yourself to handle whatever feedback may come. True humility invites constructive feedback and reflection, but it also demands a belief in your own strengths. As a leader, I find it much harder to seek honest feedback when I’m already feeling unsure about myself. On the other hand, when I feel confident in my capabilities, I'm more open to hearing where I need to improve.

Only leaders who are comfortable in their own skin can effectively empower their teams. They can delegate comprehensively and allow for frontline decision-making, knowing they’ve trained and developed their team well. A humble leader steps out of the spotlight to let others shine. Confidence and humility don’t just coexist—they enhance each other.

Myth #2: Leaders Cannot Be Both Humble and Decisive

It’s a common belief that humble leaders are indecisive, afraid to make tough calls when it matters most. Yet research, such as that of Jim Collins in his seminal book Good to Great, debunks this myth. Collins’s research highlights that the most effective leaders, those he describes as Level 5 leaders, are individuals who combine personal humility with an ironclad will to make difficult decisions.

These leaders are not indecisive; they blend humility with decisiveness to act in the best interest of their organization. When faced with tough negotiations or crisis situations, humble leaders rise to the occasion by putting the organization’s needs ahead of their ego. They don't hesitate to change direction when necessary, always with the long-term success of the team or company in mind.

Myth #3: Leaders Cannot Be Both Humble and Ambitious

Ambition is often mistaken as a purely self-serving trait. But humility and ambition can work in tandem to create remarkable leaders. A humble leader constantly questions assumptions and seeks personal growth, which are cornerstones of ambition. The willingness to ask hard questions—"Why are we failing?" "What can I do better?"—is both an act of humility and ambition.

Take Darwin Smith, the former CEO of Kimberly-Clark, as an example. Smith is often quoted for saying, “I never stopped trying to become qualified for the job.” This humility did not come at the expense of his ambition. He led Kimberly-Clark to become one of the top-performing companies by asking difficult questions and making tough decisions. Similarly, Oprah Winfrey, another extraordinary example of a humble yet ambitious leader, has overcome adversity time and again. Despite her success, she has never stopped learning and growing, remaining grounded while becoming a global media icon.

Both Smith and Oprah remind us that success doesn’t negate the need for humility. If anything, humility allows leaders to apply a growth mindset and continue striving for excellence, long after they’ve achieved great success.

Surprising Truth #1: “I Am the Captain, but I Am Not Better Than Anyone Else”

In The Captain Class, author Sam Walker set out to understand what makes the greatest sports teams of all time so successful. After studying thousands of teams, he found that their dominance wasn’t due to having the most money, talent, or even the best coaches. Instead, what set these teams apart was the presence of a humble captain who led through quiet determination and grit.

These captains weren’t necessarily the most talented players on the team, but they were willing to do the thankless work, lead by example, and make sacrifices for the team’s success. Carla Overbeck, captain of the U.S. women’s soccer team, exemplifies this. Despite her low goal-scoring record, she was a leader both on and off the field. She often carried her teammates’ bags after long flights and never hesitated to pass the ball to a teammate, even when she had a chance to score.

Overbeck’s humility allowed her to build immense trust and respect within her team. This humility didn’t make her less decisive or less ambitious—it made her a better leader. Her leadership mirrors what Collins found in his research: the best leaders combine humility with an unyielding commitment to their team’s success.

Surprising Truth #2: Humility Makes You Smarter

You might think that the key to academic success is intelligence or self-confidence. However, research shows that humility plays a surprising role in determining performance, even in academic settings.

Professor Bradley Owen of the University of Washington found that humility was the strongest predictor of student performance. In his study, students who demonstrated higher levels of humility outperformed their peers, regardless of their initial mental ability. Why? Humble students are more open to feedback and willing to act on it. They are also more realistic in assessing their own strengths and weaknesses, which allows them to plan more effectively and improve over time.

This finding resonates beyond academia. In the business world, humble leaders are constantly learning and evolving. They seek out feedback from colleagues and team members, assess their own performance honestly, and adjust their strategies accordingly. This ability to adapt and grow is critical in today’s fast-paced and ever-changing business environment.

As a parent, I’ve seen the benefits of this firsthand. My younger son, Liam, was struggling with a geography project in middle school. By frequently checking in with his teacher and humbly asking for feedback, he was able to improve his project and earn a high grade. Humility, more than intelligence, helped him succeed.

Humility is the Key to Leadership in a Complex World

Humility is often misunderstood, but it is one of the most powerful traits a leader can have. Confident leaders embrace their weaknesses, decisive leaders make tough calls for the good of the team, and ambitious leaders never stop striving for improvement—all while remaining humble. From the sports field to the classroom to the boardroom, humility unlocks potential in ways we are only beginning to understand. In a world as complex as ours, humble leadership is more essential than ever.